Stay at home regrets

Although I know that I made the right decision to stay at home and be with my baby, there are times when I look at my working friends and feel regret. They wear nice clothes and get adult conversation. They make decisions daily that do not concern rice cereal and red rashes. I don’t mean to be flippant about this, but how do I know that I did the right thing and that the financial sacrifice is worth it?

Whatever decision you made would have entailed some sacrifice. It’s the nature of the situation. So while you may envy your working friends, whether they admit it or not, there are time when they envy you. When not having to dress up, not be in a rush and trying to make correct decisions in a work enviroment when they are blurry from exhaustion after a night with a sick child, when just being at home with the baby seems like the best thing they can think of.

So remind yourself constantly that there is neither an easy nor a correct decision in this regard. Perhaps what you could look at is finding a compromise situation. There has never been a better time to be a mother with flexible options. There are job share options, work from home options and other interesting opportunities that will help you retain your individuality while still being present for your baby.

You seem to feel that you made the right decision. Looking at your life with a fresh eye and finding creative outlets for your talents that can also bring in some money may be the way to solve the envy you feel. However, if you did not feel that you had made the right decision, these decisions are not cast in stone. Women who return to work can resign and become stay at home moms. Once your baby becomes a sociable toddler, you may feel completely happy to leave your child at a crèche while you go back to work. Be flexible. Reassess the situation regularly and remind yourself that babies are so adaptable. All they need is love and security, and they will accept most of the changes that you ask them to. The right decision for the whole family includes one that makes you feel fulfilled.